Glee Recap: Mash Off
Puck is in love with Shelby Corcoran. It doesn't feel as unrealistic because of how old Mark Salling looks, but none-the-less we're reminded that Puck is "eighteen" and not 29. He rocks out to "Hot for Teacher" and it was accented by a dance sequence by Blaine and Mike; I think the emphasis is that Blaine can actually do decent choreography without looking totally dumb, Finn. Schue loved the performance even though he didn't realize the true intentions were about Shelby.
We got to watch a commercial paid for by Sue that was all Anti-Burt, it was hysterical in a weird way. The biggest joke came from Burt having a monkey heart. This upset Schue and Kurt. Kurt was upset enough to have his head explode in front of Sue. He must have been upset because his clothes were awful. This show is basically making Ohio sound like a state full of foolish people. Or at least 20% of Ohio. Sue pointed out that Brittany was making false fantasy promises. Sue pointed that she "had a cause" and suggested that Kurt needed to find a stronger, poo-like cause.
Schue had his lunchtime cookie and was greeted by Shelby. Shelby talked to Schue about the three girls jumping ship; she didn't recruit them. It was obvious that it was Rachel and Finn were the real reasons why the three jumped. They knew that competition would get ugly if things weren't moderated by teachers. Schue pointed out that it's normally mash-up season and the teachers thought that a mash-off could influence healthy competition. The two teams met up and after a smack talk battle, the teachers arrived and did a really Adult Contemporary mash-up of "You and I" and...well "You and I." That seems a little too obvious to do a mash-up of. That's like mashing up two Ke$ha songs. Or “California Gurls” and “Tik Tok.” I'm not exactly sure how the groups were all like "we're so into this" during the performance, but they were swaying to the music like this was the best thing ever. I was waiting for Delilah to pop up afterwards and tell me another love-torn music request. After the song Schue announced that both groups needed to do a head-to-head Mash-Up Mash-Off. After all this use of the word "mash" does anyone else have an urge for Tater Tots?
We return to Puck giving Shelby a small pumpkin, because apples are so passé (and unavailable). He continued to flirt and point out his undying love. He tried to play up two things: Beth and Mash-Ups. He offered his help and such, but she continued to reject him.
New Directions met and looked for music groups that would make for good mash-ups. Wait a second; did I miss the part where the mash-up had to be two songs by the same artist? What is this, The Sing-Off? Finn pointed out that they needed a group that has been together through thick and thin: Hall & Oates. We're going to ignore the fact that their relevance has waned since 1992. He suggested giving a solo to Rory. Not Blaine. Quinn confronted Puck about wanting her baby back; she's gone a bit on the loose-end. She then tried to join Trouble Tones in hoping of getting in Shelby's good graces. Luckily, Shelby isn't as stupid as those 20% of Ohio that thought that Burt had a baboon heart.
Finn talked to Rory and I'm still upset that they continue to play up his foreign-ness. Sure, let's just leave Rory as a one-note character since he's technically only supposed to have seven episodes. The two passed Santana and Finn tried to have a smack-talk off. It didn't work, so Finn decided that the only real way to deal with everything was obvious: dodge ball. What dodge ball had to do with a singing competition is beyond me.
Rachel talked to Shelby and was looking for a letter of recommendation...that Rachel wrote herself. Shelby glanced at the letter and signed it and pointed out how much pride she had for her daughter. In a moment of smart Rachel decided to let Shelby write her own letter. There was a minor passive/aggressive moment about Rachel's credentials.
The gym. Rachel tried to talk to Kurt about anything, but he gave her the silent treatment. She wanted to still be a friends and he shot her down. Of course the dodge ball game was set up so that we could get one more mash-up, this one set up to "Hit Me with Your Best Shot" and "One Way or Another." There were a lot of balls flying in the beginning where no one was really listening to rules. Apparently Rory wasn't the only person that didn't know the rules since no one actually left the court when they were hit. The Trouble-Tones won, as they pelted Rory for good measure. Kurt got in the way to stop them, in that really high womanly squeal.
At the Trouble Tones meeting, Mercedes decided not only was the group singing Adele, but she was the de-facto leader. As much as Santana gave attitude, she was out-voted. Shelby told the girls to be better, not meaner. Santana "promised" to play nice. She talked to Finn in this passive-aggressive way of asking for forgiveness. Finn finally hit a topic that would really affect her: her lesbianism. He pointed out that Santana should just come out and stop being a coward. There's that point where I wished Jacob Beth-Israel was in the back recording the whole thing.
We got another insane Sue commercial about Burt marrying a donkey. I didn't know that Carole was a Democrat. Burt threw a hissy-fit as he suggested fighting fire with fire.
Puck was taking care of Beth as Shelby tried to assemble an Ikea chair. He admitted that Quinn was trying to sabotage Shelby. It was clearly an attempt to get into Shelby's good graces. He pointed out that Beth wasn't the accident that he originally thought.
Day One of the Mash-Off. There was a rock-paper-scissors battle and they went first. Wait a second. Don't people normally opt to go second? Either way, New Directions chose to go first and mashed up "You Make My Dreams Come True" and "I Can't Go For That." Rory's "solo" was basically covered by strong harmonization from Tina. The one thing that upset me a bit was that Blaine was never next to Kurt so that they could be their own Hall & Oates.
Burt & Schue, Sue & Becky, Shelby and Principal Figgins all prepared for the student president speeches. Rick "the stick" pointed out that since the students paid taxes, then teachers should be under their control. Brittany talked about making tornadoes illegal and topless Tuesdays. That sounds like a great bar theme. Kurt went up and gave an anti-bullying speech and decided to ban dodgeball. As much as I love dodgeball, the violence isn't okay and seeing Rory seeing blood was a motivator. Rachel tried to talk about book covers, but she withdrew her nomination and urged others to vote for Kurt. Kurt talked to Rachel after and Rachel admitted that she hated how she acted against Kurt. She forgot that the two should have had the dream to go to New York together.
Quinn confronted Shelby and Shelby couldn't allow Quinn to join the Trouble Tones. Shelby pointed out that the baby is priority and petty tricks to add hot sauce wouldn't make a big difference. Quinn argued that Shelby was doing what is the best for money with Rachel. Quinn was still the lost and confused girl even without her punky attitude and clothes.
Brittany asked Santana about being mean to Finn, but before getting too deep into conversation the two were stopped by Becky. She went to Sue's office and was met by Schue, Burt, and Sue. Sue admitted to having a campaign that wasn't true at points, but it had to hurt when someone else did the trash talking. It turns out that someone (not Jacob) was recording the Finn/Santana hallway fight and created a Sue-smear campaign. We watched a really lesbian commercial that was really anti-Santana. This caused Santana to storm out but somehow perform with the Trouble Tones. It helped the whole storyline of the Adele mash-up about "rumors" but didn't really match the "Someone like You" section of the song. Of course, Finn was whispering to Rachel, because he doesn't like paying attention and this enraged Santana. Of course I'm sure both Finn and Rachel were talking positively, but Santana was now in full lesbian paranoia. So we end the week with a big smack. I mean this is one of those awkward moments where as Mr. Schue you could suspend Santana, but you know where this fear and frustration is coming from.
Next Week: Apparently we have to wait two weeks for possible Lesbian storylines. Having this broken schedule really throws off the flow of this season, which is already gearing up to be better than last season.
Michael Pascua - TVLatest.com
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